Maggie and the shrink

Aunt Maggie gets a jolt as she realises that she had meandered towards the thicket, the forbidden path, that too in the dead of the night.

“Sleepwalking can be dangerous. I might even kill somebody. How dreadful would that be? I must see Dr Redwood the first thing in the morning and tell him about this. He is well aware of all my problems, the inane telephone callers, the arrest of my nephew and of course my everlasting love for Merlot, which I don’t see as much of a problem except that once I did water the geraniums with it, but that was just once. I have to tell him about this new ailment; if I live through this night and escape becoming the supper for the wolves or bears or other wild boars.”

The thought of wild animals made Aunt Maggie shiver like a pale, wilted leaf. She had read so many stories to little Nancy who listened to all these horror stories with interest, in the cosy comfort of her bedroom.

Dr Redwood was a good friend of Phillip and a very kind hearted person who understood all her maladies, at least he said he did and kept making notes continuously with his head bent. She loved it when Dr Redwood made notes as this made her feel very important and she simply made up wild stories to add that spicy touch to her woes.

Aunt Maggie could never take her eyes off his head as she counted the four strands that still survived on his otherwise bald pate. Phillip was also bald but Dr Redwood was balder than most bald men whom she had come across in her life span of 80 odd years.

Aunt Maggie’s thoughts came to a halt as she heard the rustle of leaves. Was it a wolf or a grizzly bear? This was not one of those bed time stories she read out to little Nancy. This was real and she was in the woods, that too in the dead of night.

Aunt Maggie shivered in her night gown. She was barefooted and it hurt now. Her toes curled and the cramps were unbearable to the point where she could not get up.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…………….”she screamed in pain and then panicked. She could not control her vocal chords as the pain was excruciating. As if understanding the misery her toes miraculously unlocked and she managed to stand up. She looked around for a stick, just in case she had to defend herself.

She had no clue how to get back to the house. There were only 2 ways – one that would take her home and the other that would take her deeper into the woods.

She did exactly what Nancy would do when caught up in such situations – eena meena myna moe……and started to walk towards the direction that ended with moe…

She heard that rustle again. She was terrified. A bear covered in black fur was walking a few yards ahead of her.

"Did this mean that she was walking towards the thicket and not her home? How could eena meena myna moe have failed her when it never failed Nancy?"

Aunt Maggie was confused. She longed for her Merlot.

Just then the grizzly bear stopped and turned. It was looking straight in her direction.

Aunt Maggie froze. If she ran she knew what would happen. She was defenceless but for some strange reason felt brave.

"Roaaaarrrrrr.....she tried to mime the voice of a tiger to scare the bear away. She had read this trick in one of little Nancy’s books.

Alas! the sound emanated from her sounded like a sheep and the bear looked at her intensely.

She decided to talk to the bear, another trick from the book.

“I know who you are, she said as if talking to a child. You are not a wild grizzly bear. You mean no harm to an old lady who is nearing her grave and wishes to live a few more years. She is in no rush to go to Phillip. I bet he is having a good time in heaven with his lady friends."

“Maggie, what are you saying? How do you know that I am not a bear?"

Aunt Maggie was stupefied.

The bear had started talking to her. The trick of the book was indeed working!

She must tell this to Dr Redwood tomorrow. And she could spin a few yarns around this story, too.

Then the bear starts walking towards her.

Aunt Maggie freezes.

“Shhh……You will not reveal this to anybody, okay?

"The bear had a secret to hide?

"Reveal what?" she asks boldly in a loud tone.

“That I sleep walk in the woods at night and pretend to be a grizzly bear, and Mrs Redwood pretends that she is oblivious to this, as I am the only shrink in town. It would be a shame if the word spreads.
I have different set of problems and I compare notes when you talk to me."

Aunt Maggie faints.

Dear readers (Revathi Raj Iyer)

On this joyous occasion of Diwali, I wish to express my appreciation to all readers who have been curious enough to visit my blog and my face book page "Expression of Pearls". Thank You!

Maggie and the thief {Revathi Raj Iyer}

Aunt Maggie was sipping the morning tea left by her bedside. Some kind soul in the family must have thought that a cuppa tea will augur well than a morning Merlot, if not for her health, at least for the sake of the flora and fauna in the garden.

"Ahem, ahem, aarrghhh....."Aunt Maggie cleared her throat as the insipid liquid made its way all the way down to settle in her stomach.

Aunt Maggie slid her hands under the blanket in search of the Merlot which she was sure she went to bed with, the night before. Since the death of Philip she slept with the bottle besides her and sought its comfort in the middle of the night, when the hissing sound of the gusty wind woke her up from slumber.

Aunt Maggie glanced around the room. Everything was where she had left it, a month ago. Her room was an untidy mess and whosoever walked in with that morning cup of tea was either too kind or had lost his mind.

For some reason unknown to her, she enjoyed the tea that morning, although weak and lacked flavour; just the way she always had when Philip was alive. A flash of memory and it felt that Philip was alive and back in her life.

That morning was unusual. The house was silent. The sprinklers did not start at the dot of 9 am and there was no sound of the dishes getting stacked in the kitchen or a yell if she had anything for the laundry. Even good old Ruffle was missing.

Aunt Maggie peered outside the window, the swing was empty and little Nancy was nowhere to be seen. This was the time when she would be out playing in the garden all by herself and singing her heart out.

Aunt Maggie nearly fell off the bed at the shrill sound of the telephone. She could not save the liquid nor the cup. The cup crashed into pieces on the stone tile and the tea stained the carpet, making it even harder to figure out the original colour and design of the ancient carpet which was of  Persian origin but over the years looked like a piece of trash.

"I have to get rid of this carpet," she thought to herself and dropped the saucer.

"What is a cup without a saucer?"

Aunt Maggie slipped her feet awkwardly inside the fluffy shoes half chewed by Ruffle and manages to toddle out of the room. Carefully clutching the railing, as if holding it for dear life, Aunt Maggie walks down the stairs slowly. She could clearly tell that she was all alone. The phone kept ringing and by the time she reached and picked the receiver, the caller had hung up.

"Darn, you stupid old thing," she muttered and went to the kitchen. It was neat and there were no signs of breakfast having been made that morning. No cereal remnants on the floorboard. The kettle was empty.

Aunt Maggie had absolutely no idea as to how the morning tea made its way to her room.

The phone broke her thoughts and this time she hastened a bit, to pick it up.

"Hello," she hollered.

"Madam, good morning. How was the morning tea?" the caller asked.

Aunt Maggie was confused.

"Who the heck are you and why are you enquiring about my morning tea?"

"Because I left it for you," he said.

Aunt Maggie was befuddled.

"Do you think I am a fool? Why on earth would you make me a cup of tea?"

"Madam, I am a thief and I have emptied your house of all its precious belongings. I left the tea by your bedside, just out of pity, because it seemed your family had deserted you. I have some good sense in me, you see!"

"How did you get in?" Aunt Maggie demanded.

"The door was wide open and I easily walked in," said the caller.

"How could her nephew have left without saying a word to her, although he had threatened several times that  he would do so. That spitfire of a wife he was married to, must have made him do this. They left the door wide open? How utterly ruthless. Even little Nancy had not pranced into her room? Even Ruffle had not said good bye?"

A wave of self-pity swept over her. She was abandoned in her own house.

"Now do you understand why I could not leave the house without offering you a cup of tea?" the caller said.

"To hell with you all," retorts Aunt Maggie and slams the receiver.

She opens the cabinet near the end of the stair case, where she always hid a Merlot in case of an emergency. She fondles the sleek neck of the bottle and looks ruefully at it. This was an emergency.

She slowly climbs the stairs up to her room. Huffing and coughing she pulls the edges of the disgusting stained carpet, in a fit of rage and despair.

Her eyes open wider than a saucer.

Multitudes of $$$$ bills lay there neatly stacked underneath. The tiles had been neatly removed and substituted by the $$$$.

Aunt Maggie sees the smiling face of Phil on each one of them.

The day Philip had that fatal heart attack he did mention that he had done something drastic.

"What have you done? You look as if you have robbed a bank!" she had exclaimed.

She finishes the bottle and smashes it on the stone tile and fumbles her way downstairs to the phone, with a wicked grin.

"Hello officer, my nephew has robbed a bank and is absconding. I can help you with more details."

She chuckles and chuckles .......